…and your heart is in your chest.
Just a little Doctor Horrible for you.
So my time home has been lovely, if not tiring. Okay. It’s been exhausting. I didn’t think that I would spend this much time with people to be honest. My main goal was to see my dogs, but apparently I’m far more loved than I thought.
Naturally I made it a priority to snuggle my dogs, see my little cousins, and to snuggle my dogs.
I want to take this opportunity (that I’ve given myself haha) to thank and express tons upon tons of love for my people. I haven’t kept up with my gratitude pages these last few weeks so here’s a giant list of things I’m grateful for (in no particular order):
1)My parents, who lovingly paid for the dentist appointments that were unforeseen, the parties that I requested in order to see all my family members in two goes, and just in general for being awesome parents and sending me back to Vancouver with a pocketful of cash, a heart full of love, and a mind full of memories. I’m so lucky to have parents that care that much and actually shed tears of sadness when I leave the house instead of tears of joy. Even when I’m a snot and nearly puke whenever they show affection. I’m not gagging on the inside. I promise.
2)I was asked to be a bridesmaid last week in the three seconds that I got to see my best friend. Okay, so it was hours and we were both tired, but I appreciated the chat and the honour of being one in six of her closest people. I also love that she still puts up with my antics after all these years and only called me ‘fucker’ once. (Which is usually reserved for when I’m being a right shit. Or if she’s trying to wake me up. Or if I haven’t texted her in a few days. Or if I look at her funny. Or if I look at her.)
3)I happily spent a few hours making spingi with my Nonno and my cousin Sal while my preggers cousins sat at the kitchen table talking and growing more spawn. And the rest of the day with their out of the womb kids who I made dinosaurs out of playdough with and watched as they snuck more cookies and cupcakes than was allotted. …okay, so I gave them the cookies. I thoroughly enjoy the perks of being a cousin.
4)I met baby Henry for the first time! To which his response to my love and adoration was to promptly yak down his front. Seven times. It made me feel so happy that Violet is happy and not resentful of the new baby and actually plays with him and treats him sweetly. (Not that I expected her to throw him down a well, but I was worried she’d hate me for cooing over the little guy since I’m basically her favourite person and wouldn’t want to betray her by showing love for another. We’re sickeningly loyal and selfish like that.)
5)Seeing that Malcolm is getting crazy tall. For being only 9, he’s quickly reaching my older sisters height. (She’s 31 and only around 5’2.)
6)I got to see three out of five of my girls! Talking houses, engagements, love, loss, crazy family, and boys, boys, boys. I can’t even begin to express my love for them and the heavy feeling I get whenever they are down on their luck or something bad happens. They lift me up though and are my greatest cheerleaders. I thank God I met them and that they are continuously in my life whether I’m near or far. Somehow we still manage to say goodbye a thousand times and never really leave each other. (Figuratively and literally, it took a solid hour to say goodbye one day.)
7)My bad ass teachers that scream with joy when they see me and crush my ribs in bear hugs. Laughing hysterically during singing and piano lessons is still on my list of favourite things. My chakra classes really did add new things to my voice, confirmed by my singing teacher who says I have more rich low tones in my voice. (Yay me! My brother can officially start calling me by my super hero name: Chakra Khan. As my super powers are coming in.) These two bring so much positivity into my life I should really find ways to bottle it. Even when I’m literally cursing my hands or pulling faces at myself or threatening to throw the piano out the window they both draw me out of my head and into the present moment, showing me that it’s okay to mess things up when I’m learning. I don’t have to be perfect all the time. Hell, I don’t even have to be perfect at all. I’m starting to think they prefer it when I’m a complete goof troop and fumble through life.
8)My siblings. They ditched me for FanExpo and I don’t blame them. (They met Nathan Fillion and Norman Reedus.) Mostly because my brother bought me River Songs sonic screwdriver and it’s pretty well glued to my hand. My little sister who told me to stop hitting myself in the face (and wasn’t the one who was making me hit me) because it’ll bruise. (My face was frozen from the dentist. She informed me that I looked like I had a stroke. I called Two-Face and I’m planning an acid attack on myself.) My older sister who didn’t tell me to stop being a jackass in Walmart while I hyperly played with a piece of yarn and nearly wet myself laughing about it even though it was not even remotely funny. Small mind.
9)My dogs. Who guarded the bathroom door, cried when I left them alone, laid on me, beside me, around me, and sometimes in my actual clothing because they are super creeps, let me hug them, squeeze them, give them raspberries, play with their ears, spoon with me, stare into each others eyes, escorted me to the bathroom, laundry room, kitchen, living room, and out the front door. Were so unbelievably happy to see me whenever I reappeared in a room. And let me kiss their faces every second I could and leaning in for the kiss. (I pulled a muscle giving Dexter a kiss.)
10)My grandparents, for the presents, the love, the extra hugs, food, lessons on cooking, and gossip sessions. Not to mention the hilarious jokes that I can’t remember but remember laughing really hard at.
11)Meeting my ginger best friends lady love and getting to spend even the smallest amount of time with him while we stuffed our faces with sushi. That guys bravery and tenacity keeps me going on a daily basis. Even when things are the hardest he shows up for me and helps me make plans. *bows down* We’re not worthy.
12)Getting to exchange Christmas gifts in August with another friend. (We made each other dish clothes last Christmas and had a good laugh over it.) Talking life, vacations, boys, and just in general reestablishing our friendship. Getting to know her boyfriend more and again, stuffing my face with sushi. I’m sending good luck vibes their way. And engagement vibes. Muahaha.
13)Spending time with a reaaaally old friend. Not literally old, we’re the same age. But the opportunity came along to spend about five hours chatting and we caught each other up on our lives from high school to present day! I have no idea why we haven’t spent the last 9 odd years attached at the hip! It was fantastic seeing her again!
14)My coworkers for allowing me the chance to do all of this! I really, really, needed it! And coming back to a bag of unicorns was an awesome surprise!
15)Spending a day with my mom and my aunt. I love learning new things about my family and appreciate new drinks we invent together.
16)Talking tv shows and random things with my minion.
17)Veal. And the ninja-like qualities my Nonna possesses when it comes to feeding me.
18)Being greeted in Vancouver by my fellow chakra class student and kindred spirit completely by accident. Nice to be welcomed back by a friendly face and a hug.
19)My sister and my roommate taking care of Doomsday while I was gone.
20)My dead armed extra sister making an appearance at the family BBQ when my other siblings were MIA. And then re-hurting herself to the point where she puked because she picked something up with said “dead arm”.
If I missed you or left out some key quality time moments just know that I loved every second of every day that I got to spend with my friends and family and people.
And if I forgot you it’s probably because I hate your stinkin’ guts.
Constant vigilance.
The Deranged Librarian 