Dark Witch–Nora Roberts

This lovely set of romance novels was from my Grandmother on my last birthday, who said “I thought you would like these. They are about witches and magic. And I’ve heard there’s not much dirty stuff in it. So it’s not weird that I’m giving them to you.”

To which I replied “What’s the point if there is no dirty stuff in them?!”

And she swatted at me and called me a ‘Dirty bird’.

She was right though, they weren’t too dirty.

This one was kind of boring actually. I just wanted them to hump and get it over with!

This is the story of cousins who are fighting an age old demon, curse, and family blight.

Which I actually forget his name. I think it starts with a ‘D’…

Anyway. This book fell flat for me just because I don’t like Iona. (The lead in this novel.) She says everything she thinks and none of it seems too bright. She expects a quiet angry man to just start emoting the second they meet and it just all felt forced, too fast for a relationship, and all around pointless for the plot.
Sure, it’s great to see people fall in love, but I could never tell if this book was taking place over months or weeks, it wasn’t the greatest read.

Saying that, the series DID eventually grow on me.

Tune in next week.

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That Time I Tried

…to give up caffeine.

Hahahahahahaha.

No.

I give up giving up.

 

This week has been weird and short and long and brutal and yes.

Yesterday I made the dumb decision to give up drinking Iced Capps for various reasons (sugar addiction, teeth staining, blah blah blah) but I’ve since decided ‘screw that’ since I was the angriest bear on the planet and I had an extra kid here and what a terrible time to make that decision.

I will try again, but for the sake of the toddlers, I will try again on a day that makes sense.

That way I won’t have my little buddy look at me and say “I’m sorry for making you angry.” It wasn’t you Booboo. It’s never you. (Which I said to him.) I said ‘Alli needs a coffee, she’s tired and a grumpy bear.” and he asked if he could get me one.

When a toddler offers to get you a drink you have problems.

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True Story Tuesday

Oh hey there. Hope everyone had a great long weekend!

Here’s what I did all weekend. I loved having zero responsibility, but I’m so glad to be back to work. My liver couldn’t take another drunk day. But your best friend only turns 30 once so I did what I had to do. And then I jumped over the fence of ‘Alcohol Limitations’ and fell in the Field of Vodka Decisions without shoes on or a verbal filter.

Yes, yes. Haha.

 

Hope you had a great weekend too!

Constant vigilance!

DerangedLibrarian Store

I don’t normally post things about my Etsy store on here (besides saying I have one.) BUT this is the one year anniversary of my ‘Whiskey’ cross stitch. So I wanted to be grateful that people have bought things from my store, that I can mail out dirty and funny and lovely cross stitches to people all around the world because of Etsy and just yay yay yay for finding one of my figs!!! (I’ll explain later.)

SO! For the one year anniversary we are having a 15% off sale! (By ‘we’ I mean ‘me’ because I’m the only person who makes things for the store. I’m cool like that. A goddamn one woman enterprise.)

You just have to type in WHISKEY for the 15% off on anything you like and thank you to the universe for such a great thing in my life. (Sale ends June 1st!)

DerangedLibrarian for the cross stitch heaven of your dreams! haha

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I’ll explain the fig tree next week.

Happy Thursday!

Constant vigilance.

The Short Stack.

Good morning everyone!

I’m clearing house of the tiny reviews. So here’s four to take a gander at.

Summer of My Amazing Luck—Miriam Toews

Literally only picked this up because I knew it was set in the summer. (Book challenge #14-A Book Set in the Summer [26BooksWithBringingUpBurns 2015.])

What a treat it was though! I love this writer, she’s really in tune with empathy over sympathy. It’s very interesting to read her books because they are about real humans and their struggles.

All about people living on welfare and their troubles, stories, and how they rise or fall.

Definitely interesting to pick up. In this you follow Lucy through how she got to the Have-A-Life welfare housing, how she makes friends, and then ends up on a road trip with her friend Lish to find a fire eater that knocked her up awhile ago.

Very cool take, I can’t gush enough about this writer, but I’ll stop for your sake.

Truly great.

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I Feel Bad About My Neck (And Other thoughts on being a woman)—Nora Efron

Okay. This also might seem like an odd choice for me to read but hear me out:

I was reading a lot of female authors and was like ‘Hey. This lady writes sweet movies and books and maybe she has some perspective as well on being a woman that would interest me like the last five!”

Well unless you are over 50, don’t bother with this.

I found it quite boring and useless. Which sounds awful since I do like her movies, but I didn’t gain anything from this or learn anything besides ‘I never want to get old’.

*Audience booing*

To be completely fair to her: I will read her other books in the future, I just happened to pick a dud for my age group. Her writing was good, I just didn’t connect to what she was going through and didn’t much care for her stories.

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(#16 A Book You Learned About Because of this Challenge….this might be a stretch I think, I was just trying to fill in holes. But I did learn about this because of the other books I was looking through for this challenge, so that has to count.)

The Pilot’s Wife—Anita Shreve

Someone suggested this to me when I lived in Vancouver and it’s been sitting around on my shelves ever since.

That’s how backed up my reading list is. I’m hitting living at home for two years already.

Jesus Christ I need to get my shit together.

Anyway.

This book is about a woman (obviously) who’s husband was a pilot.

Shocker. Haha.

Her husbands plane goes down and she has to deal with all that comes with it. Including their teenage daughter and her grief.

I really loved this book actually, it was beautifully written, not overwhelming with emotions and drama, and enough mystery to hold my attention.

Thank you to the random lady in Vancouver who suggested that I read Anita Shreve’s books. I’m excited to read more of her stuff in the future.

(#18 A book with a blue cover.)

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Spending the Holidays with People I Want to Punch in the Throat: Yuletide Yahoos, Ho-Ho-Humblebraggers, and Other Seasonal Scourges—Jen Mann

This book jumped the line because I was in the mood for a holiday laugh. (I read this around Christmas) My cousins family gave this to me. (I’m their nanny and I get all the good stuff from them. Including baby snuggles!)

It was hysterical. And accurate as all hell.

Start to finish had me laughing. And nodding like ‘I feel ya girl!”.

Definitely worth it for a present to someone with a sense of humour around the holidays. Or for a treat for yourself because it was awesome.

Short and sweet and to the point. Just like this review.

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Bunnicula—Deborah and James Howe

Another present from a family member, my Auntie Jo (or as she calls herself Aunt Torage. Best word play of life.) I was presented with this for my birthday because I love bunnies, I love horror, and I love ridiculous novels written for children.

This was a good and spoooOOOoooky read.

Okay, it was all right. It IS for kids after all. But it was pretty cute and funny and I’m sure some kid somewhere is having nightmares about this rabbit.

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Happy Monday everyone! Constant vigilance!

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Puppy Love

 

I friggin love my dogs. Artie is so smart and handsome, a real snuggle butt and always wants to be your friend, and Dexter (AKA-Goose) is such a happy little weasel, she got her nickname from the fact that she gooses you when you walk in the house, and she’s always up for hugs and kisses and funny games.

I taught her that if “Statue”, where you stand real still and then out of nowhere pop up and scare the other one. It’s hysterical when she does it.

 

Goose and Artie!

Constant vigilance.