Slaughterhouse-Five–Kurt Vonnegut

I’m notorious for not liking classics at this point, yes? 

This one also joins the 3-star club. 

I’m also notorious for just blindly walking into a book instead of reading the dust jacket. 

Let me tell you what I thought this book was about.

Based off the title alone I thought this was about five people who survived some sort of grisly event in a slaughterhouse. My mind immediately thought: Holocaust. Because this just LOOKS like a book my friend would suggest and he always suggests Holocaust books to me because he likes to devastate my soul at least once a year. 

All I remember from this book is that I get a twitch from the sentence “So it goes.” now. 

What is this book actually about? 

The Holocaust. And the Dresden bombings. And so, so much more. Like alien abductions. 

The timeline goes back and forth and up and down and the main character Billy has PTSD and he gets married and has kids and travels back in time and yes. That’s the book. 

I read this back in January 2018 because I wanted to start the year off with a classic. I didn’t fully believe this was going to be about something so dreary. I’m always getting tricked into reading about the Holocaust. 

Even by me.

Go figure I start the year off with an event I hate reading in books because I’ve visited the Dachau concentration camp and my soul wants to throw up every time I think about it. 

And the books title is because it’s about POWs being held in a slaughterhouse…labeled ‘Slaughterhouse Five’. 

So I wasn’t totally off. 

Constant vigilance.

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The Tommyknockers–Stephen King


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Literally: Scared my pants off.

Figuratively: Stressed me out hardcore.

Uh, scratch that, reverse it. This book was not as stress inducing as Misery, didn’t have me under the covers crying like a little bitch, but it DID freak me the hell out so much that I had nightmares.

So I guess I’m still a little bitch. But that’s okay, because I really really needed to read this book and tuck it away in my memory for future reference when I need to call up a disturbed scene in a book.

IE: The whole last half of the book.

The plot is that a western writer lives in the forest alone with her dog that is getting old and going blind in one eye. One day, she trips over this metal thing in the woods. Decides to dig it out. Realizes she’s been digging for a seriously long time and has a period of epic proportions. Scary proportions. Now if you are a girl, you understand that this is petrifying and a serious sign that something is wrong in your ‘verse. If you are a guy, you probably think ‘Oh shit, that’s not good, get that girl to a hospital’. And we thank you for that, we really do. Haha.

But what do you really do when there are alien life forms a comin’ and you can feel in your bones that your best friend is in deep shit? Well, if you’re Jim Gardner, you get wasted and then try to die.

OR you go and help. Either one, really.

I loved this book in that it was exactly what I was looking for. Good writing, good plot, surprising as fuck, and scary because it rolls a handful of my nightmares into one and glorious stressfest.

And I don’t like to be scared from books, so you know I really mean it.

The Host–Stephanie Meyers

How embarrassing. I just read my old review of this and I refer to ‘Twilight’ as brilliant writing. *Hangs head in shame. * I was in my super early twenties when I read it. So don’t judge me. The movies suck, but the books were good.(Also, I sometimes write in a British accent.)

            THE HOST. RIGHT! That’s what we’re supposed to be talking about.

This book still holds up through the years of which I haven’t read it. (Reread it because the movie is coming out, obviously. I don’t read for fun, jeez.)

Anyway, so it’s about the end of world. OOoOooOooo scary stuff. Aliens take over our bodies and are called “Souls” and there is a rebel unit fighting for our humanity.

The Wanderer, one of the oldest souls that has been to the most places in all the worlds, is attached to a host called Melanie, who is a fighter. Wanderer can hear her in her head and Melanie is fighting to be heard and trying to kick Wanderer to the curb.

Fights, fears, tears, operations, etc. Everything you could want in a good book. Oh, and there’s a bunch of love stories going on, which is really nice. I love a good love story in with some science fiction. And before I go off on a Doctor Who rant again, I’ll end this post.

            Definitely recommend this for ages 16 and beyond.