We’re Going to Need More Wine–Gabrielle Union

This woman. THIS WOMAN. 

She’s a badass. BAD. ASS. 

You know when you see a book written by an actress and you’re like “Meh, I liked her. Maybe I’ll give it a read.” 

Well thank FUCK I DID.

This introduced me to a fucking FORCE of a woman. 

I learned so much from Gabrielle in this book that I never would have learned otherwise. Or at the very least got the perspective of! 

Gabrielle talks about what it means to be a woman, a black woman, and what that means as a stepmother for her children, what that means she’s looking out for, and so much racial bias and discrimination that I have never and will never have to endure because I’m a white woman. 

But fuuuuck did she open my eyes to some shit that I would never have thought of. 

Because I don’t have to. 

This body checked my white privilege hard. 

Her story is heartbreaking, beautiful, and a life of complete and utter badassery that I’ve never seen the likes of.

Fuck I love her. 

Read this book. Now. 

Constant vigilance!

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Becoming–Michelle Obama

Not going to lie, I thought this would be boring. I love Michelle Obama, she is a fun time for a First Lady. But because of BEING a First Lady, I thought she was going to have to shove a bunch of stuff under the rug.

And she didn’t. 

She was honest about how she felt about the Presidency affecting her family, her career, and what everything would look like going forward with a President that lacks any sort of maturity or decorum.

She said it nicely though but still made it obvious how she was feeling about it all.

This book was just as classy and sassy as Michelle is in real life. Or as far as I’ve seen her in real life, which is interviews and clowning around with people like Jimmy Fallon and James Cordon. 

Either way, I love her. And her relationship with her husband seems to be really healthy and forward. 

The part I really enjoyed, besides her love story with Barack, was her telling HER history. I liked learning so much about her as a human being and her career. 

Damn this was a good book.

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This Will Only Hurt a Little–Busy Philipps

I haven’t always loved Busy Philipps. Or rather, her characters. I’m looking at whoever she played on Dawson’s Creek. But I was also like early teens when I was watching that show, so really, I had no stake in the game. 

BUT. I did love her in Freaks and Geeks. And Cougar Town was hilarious.

Then Instagram came along and eventually her fame on there for being incredibly hilarious. 

Which inevitably gave her a book deal, which makes sense. Or does it? What world are we living in anymore? 

Anyway, I’m happy that she got a book deal.

I read this when I was still running my book club and this was one of the picks from my sisters. 

It was well written and funny in the bits that needed to be funny, sad in the parts that were incredibly upsetting, and overall, a beautiful book.

She covered a lot of stuff and I’m grateful she was brave enough to share her story in the way that she did. Busy talks about her first time having sex, her relationship with her husband, and her friendships. It’s an honest book and I really loved her being so candid with us.

Which is how she just lives her life, so that was impressive to see she wasn’t sugar-coating anything for the benefit of others.

She was incredibly real in this.

I loved it. And her. 

Constant vigilance! busy

This is Me–Chrissy Metz

Classic. After I said I was going to write every day I immediately forgot and here we are four days later.

But here we go.

SPOILERS TO “THIS IS US” FIRST SEASON. 

Now, I knew I was going to like this book immediately because I really like Chrissy Metz as a human. (Not that I know her in real life. What an assumption I made based off of interviews and the like!)

I’ll admit that I don’t fully like her character in This Is Us and it’s because of one thing. 

After her father went back into their burning house and saved her dog because she was losing her mind crying because the dog was stuck and dying, she did something unforgivable. 

(Hello. Who WOULDN’T be LOSING THEIR SHIT AT THAT. I would’ve gone back in for my dog in a HEARTBEAT.) 

After Jack dies: SHE STARTS HATING ON HER DOG.

EXCUSE YOU!!! 

Your dog didn’t kill him. Don’t you dare pin that on a dog! It was just a horrible circumstance. 

If my dad died saving my dog I would be like YOU’RE A HERO JOE. AND GOD BLESS YOU FOR SAVING MY SWEET ANGEL DEXTER. AND I WOULD LOVE THAT DOG MORE BECAUSE MY DAD SAVED HER FOR ME AND I WOULD NEVER IN A MILLION YEARS BLAME A DOG FOR THE DEMISE OF MY FATHER.

Unless Dexter tripped him on the way out the door and somehow kicked it behind her and my dad got trapped and burned to death.

THEN I would probably be like “Damn it Goose you fluffy adorable murderer.” (We call Dexter ‘Goose’ because she gooses your bum when you come in the door like a perverted old man.)

Wait. I’m supposed to be talking about a book. Not why I don’t like Kate. Or at least, teenage Kate. 

THIS BOOK WAS LOVELY.

It gives you the feels. It makes you feel like you have a comrade in arms. It makes you feel like you aren’t alone in feeling like you are a fat piece of trash and then she lifts you right back up to show you how you are BEAUTIFUL and MAJESTIC and everything is just as it should be. No matter what size you are you are fucking amazing. You hear me?!

Chrissy’s writing was full of heart and kindness, and past self-deprecation and it was lovely.

Plus I love seeing women living their dreams on their terms and how they became that way.

She is a fucking star and amazing. 

But teenage Kate can get bent. Ya hear me?

Constant vigilance.

chrissy

I Like You Just the Way I Am–Jenny Mollen

Oh hi there! Just wanted to check in. Say hey.

If you’re on instagram you’ve likely seen this smash hit of a human being. 

She’s insane. And loveable. And insane. 

But like, in a fun way that makes you want to sit near her while she tells you stories in all her twirling chaotic glory. 

Jenny just seems like a person who you can be best friends with in a way that requires very little of you because she is THE SHOW.

Which is great for an introvert in a sense, but would also be hell on earth because she would need you to DO THE THINGS. But MAN would you laugh while doing it.

I really enjoyed this book, she’s got a refreshing personality and wit. 

Definitely worth a read, I can’t wait to read her next and newest book. 

jenny

But Enough About Me–Burt Reynolds

I think I’m psychic sometimes. 

Or I’m an evil witch who accidentally marks a person for death upon reading their autobiography. 

Poor sweet dirty bird Burt Reynolds. 

This book was so fun to read and incredibly interesting! 

I love a good autobiography these days and I really enjoyed how this sounds how he talked. His stories were cool, his life was amazing, and his heart was big as all get out. 

And man did he love Sally Field. 

And hate that photo shoot on the rug. He even wrote in the book how when he dies he hopes that no one remembers him JUST for that. 

Go figure on social media that’s the picture EVERYONE and their mother was putting up to commemorate him.

Rest in peace you hairy bastard. 

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The Girl With the Lower Back Tattoo–Amy Schumer

Two for two on surprise book back to back. First Kris Jenner, and now Amy Schumer. 

So I originally intended to read this book and get it off my shelf because I kept seeing the cover and being like ‘UGH. Amy Schumer! Stop fucking staring at me.” 

But what I ended up with was a well written book about her life and I came to actually respect and life her as a person.

Who knew? 

I’ve never really liked her stage show, I don’t know why. I think sometimes I think it’s enough with the vagina jokes. (Guess I have to be in the mood for that.) 

I’m not a prude when it comes to hilarious and gross and out there jokes, sometimes she gets a really good laugh from me.

But I was thinking that I was about to read a book that read like her comedy sketches go: Over the top and trying too hard.

What I got was slap in the face with the reality of who she is. 

Which is that she’s not just her onstage persona. Whaaaat?! That happens?! She can be quiet and reserved? Who knew. (Sarcasm guys. I know that people aren’t always what they seem or portray to people on stage.) 

This book has ended with me feeling for Amy Schumer and hoping that she has a great life and career and can actually DO something about gun control.

She’s great. And I wasn’t expecting to like this book, but she got me.

She really got me. 

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Kris Jenner and All Things Kardashian–Kris Jenner

This book was deceiving as fuck. 

Given the title I thought I was just about to read you know…gossip. 

Totally expected Kris to dish with me on …well ‘All Things Kardashian’.

I thought I was going to read a palette cleansing book before moving on to other more in-depth and interesting books, but Kris surprised me by not just being a decent writer and story-teller, but by having an interesting life before her kids and before Bruce. (AKA: Caitlyn. This book was written when they were still together and in love and nothing had come to light.) 

What I did NOT expect was that she was going to spend most of the book talking about her friend Nicole Brown Simpson and the OJ Simpson trial and how it affected her family and friends. It was interesting to get her perspective, and I don’t just mean interesting in a gossip seeking way. She ACTUALLY had real tea to spill and real information to share.

And real heartbreak that she went through. 

I really enjoyed this book, you know, as much as you can about a family going through tragedy.

It was super interesting: Up until she started talking about her kids careers. 

B-oring.

Constant vigilance!

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The Long Hard Road Out of Hell–Marilyn Manson

“What the fuck did I get myself into?”

This is the thought that came up the most when I read this book. 

Look, I know who Marilyn Manson is. I’ve heard some of his music, I’ve read stories about what the fuck he gets into. I know he has beef with Justin Beiber about some t-shirts. 

I don’t know why I know that but I do. 

I know he was married to Dita Von Teese (who I adore.), dated Rose McGowan, and that he’s in general a pretty fucking weird guy. 

I didn’t realize how gross he was. 

This book was traumatizing in its brilliance, but also just gross because of gross things he did. He would scare me every other page with a startling pictures. Which I’m betting was the point. This guy is smart as hell and clever as a whip. And yes, for a while he was using his powers for evil and not good. But he took a long journey back to us (I’m sure he would resent that statement. Because who is “us”? The human race?)  and he’s finally becoming a human being. 

I think.

I don’t know.

This book was super messed up. His stories of his golden ages were really fucked up. As one would expect. 

And then he would hit you with a story of how it hurts that people would harm themselves or others in his name. And you’re like ‘You poor soul, let me hold you.”. 

Really think about it before you read this book. I didn’t . And I’m both worse and better for it.

It was intelligently thought out and executed in it’s contrasting unnerving you and making you love him at the same time.  

Constant vigilance.

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I, Bificus–Bif Naked

Oh Biffy. 

What has happened to you. 

All the things. All the good and all the bad. And all the in-between things. 

I’ve loved Bif since I was teeny little preteen and so much of my early teens was filled with her music. And I’m so glad to finally read her words on the things that happened to her. 

And SOooooooOOooooo much happened to her. 

Fuck. 

Just read this. It’s so goddamn good that I have no words for how good it is. 

I’ve literally tried to write extra paragraphs about it but I honestly have zero words. Just a feeling about this book. Like I want to grab her close and squeeze her tight.

So many bad things happen to people (duh) and she got more dollops than I have that’s for sure. Which makes me always feel like that Lady Gaga song “Come to Mama”.

Come to Mama. Tell me who hurt ya .

Constant vigilance.

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