This Will Only Hurt a Little–Busy Philipps

I haven’t always loved Busy Philipps. Or rather, her characters. I’m looking at whoever she played on Dawson’s Creek. But I was also like early teens when I was watching that show, so really, I had no stake in the game. 

BUT. I did love her in Freaks and Geeks. And Cougar Town was hilarious.

Then Instagram came along and eventually her fame on there for being incredibly hilarious. 

Which inevitably gave her a book deal, which makes sense. Or does it? What world are we living in anymore? 

Anyway, I’m happy that she got a book deal.

I read this when I was still running my book club and this was one of the picks from my sisters. 

It was well written and funny in the bits that needed to be funny, sad in the parts that were incredibly upsetting, and overall, a beautiful book.

She covered a lot of stuff and I’m grateful she was brave enough to share her story in the way that she did. Busy talks about her first time having sex, her relationship with her husband, and her friendships. It’s an honest book and I really loved her being so candid with us.

Which is how she just lives her life, so that was impressive to see she wasn’t sugar-coating anything for the benefit of others.

She was incredibly real in this.

I loved it. And her. 

Constant vigilance! busy

Born a Crime–Trevor Noah

This man. 

Born in South Africa, raised by a loving but hardheaded faith-driven woman, his father a Swiss-man that he barely had a relationship with because he was white and it was legitimately a crime for them to be family.

This was another book that I listened to on audiotape because I got into a real NEED TO DEVOUR ALL BOOKS IN ALL FORMS type of mood. So I was basically reading all hours of the day.

And let me tell you, you don’t mind being told a story as an adult as long as the persons voice is as smooth and sweet and charismatic as Trevor Noah’s.

He put so much personality into his stories and it’s always great to have authors read their books to you because then you know how the story was meant to be told. 

I love reading about real-life people’s lives and how different they are from mine, so this was pretty dang far off from how I grew up. 

Because I’m a white girl from small-town Ontario who grew up with both parents and four siblings and essentially boring on top of beige on top of bland. 

Except not because I had four siblings so we were actually wild fucking animals. 

Anyway, read this book, listen to it, it was lovely and smart and I really love him.

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Furiously Happy: A Funny Book About Horrible Things—Jenny Lawson

After reading the horror show that is ‘A Simple Favor’ I needed a HUGE laugh and a promise of no incest. 

Enter Jenny Lawson. 

I had read one of her other books so I knew what I was getting into. The issue I had with this one is simple:

I listened to it on audiobook read by her and nearly crashed my car a million times from laughing too hard. 

Stories about her pets, daughter, and long-suffering husband Viktor are always funny and amazing and I love how she touches on mental health and what hers is and how she (and her family) handle it. 

It was lovely to read about how she’s not okay, but she’s okay. And how scary it can get, and how putting her story out helps her and helps us. 

I just love her. This one goes on the shelf of ‘Everyone needs to read this’ because I love how it touched on mental health and family and it still felt like she was talking to us as a friend and not just telling us about her life matter of factly and that’s that.

You know? 

I love her writing, I love her penchant for loving horribly done taxidermy, and I love that I can expect more and more books from her. 

She’s wonderful. 

Constant vigilance.

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This is Me–Chrissy Metz

Classic. After I said I was going to write every day I immediately forgot and here we are four days later.

But here we go.

SPOILERS TO “THIS IS US” FIRST SEASON. 

Now, I knew I was going to like this book immediately because I really like Chrissy Metz as a human. (Not that I know her in real life. What an assumption I made based off of interviews and the like!)

I’ll admit that I don’t fully like her character in This Is Us and it’s because of one thing. 

After her father went back into their burning house and saved her dog because she was losing her mind crying because the dog was stuck and dying, she did something unforgivable. 

(Hello. Who WOULDN’T be LOSING THEIR SHIT AT THAT. I would’ve gone back in for my dog in a HEARTBEAT.) 

After Jack dies: SHE STARTS HATING ON HER DOG.

EXCUSE YOU!!! 

Your dog didn’t kill him. Don’t you dare pin that on a dog! It was just a horrible circumstance. 

If my dad died saving my dog I would be like YOU’RE A HERO JOE. AND GOD BLESS YOU FOR SAVING MY SWEET ANGEL DEXTER. AND I WOULD LOVE THAT DOG MORE BECAUSE MY DAD SAVED HER FOR ME AND I WOULD NEVER IN A MILLION YEARS BLAME A DOG FOR THE DEMISE OF MY FATHER.

Unless Dexter tripped him on the way out the door and somehow kicked it behind her and my dad got trapped and burned to death.

THEN I would probably be like “Damn it Goose you fluffy adorable murderer.” (We call Dexter ‘Goose’ because she gooses your bum when you come in the door like a perverted old man.)

Wait. I’m supposed to be talking about a book. Not why I don’t like Kate. Or at least, teenage Kate. 

THIS BOOK WAS LOVELY.

It gives you the feels. It makes you feel like you have a comrade in arms. It makes you feel like you aren’t alone in feeling like you are a fat piece of trash and then she lifts you right back up to show you how you are BEAUTIFUL and MAJESTIC and everything is just as it should be. No matter what size you are you are fucking amazing. You hear me?!

Chrissy’s writing was full of heart and kindness, and past self-deprecation and it was lovely.

Plus I love seeing women living their dreams on their terms and how they became that way.

She is a fucking star and amazing. 

But teenage Kate can get bent. Ya hear me?

Constant vigilance.

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Slaughterhouse-Five–Kurt Vonnegut

I’m notorious for not liking classics at this point, yes? 

This one also joins the 3-star club. 

I’m also notorious for just blindly walking into a book instead of reading the dust jacket. 

Let me tell you what I thought this book was about.

Based off the title alone I thought this was about five people who survived some sort of grisly event in a slaughterhouse. My mind immediately thought: Holocaust. Because this just LOOKS like a book my friend would suggest and he always suggests Holocaust books to me because he likes to devastate my soul at least once a year. 

All I remember from this book is that I get a twitch from the sentence “So it goes.” now. 

What is this book actually about? 

The Holocaust. And the Dresden bombings. And so, so much more. Like alien abductions. 

The timeline goes back and forth and up and down and the main character Billy has PTSD and he gets married and has kids and travels back in time and yes. That’s the book. 

I read this back in January 2018 because I wanted to start the year off with a classic. I didn’t fully believe this was going to be about something so dreary. I’m always getting tricked into reading about the Holocaust. 

Even by me.

Go figure I start the year off with an event I hate reading in books because I’ve visited the Dachau concentration camp and my soul wants to throw up every time I think about it. 

And the books title is because it’s about POWs being held in a slaughterhouse…labeled ‘Slaughterhouse Five’. 

So I wasn’t totally off. 

Constant vigilance.

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The Bend in the Road–Nicholas Sparks

I needed this book after I read Marilyn Mansons book. 

I needed to scrub my brain for awhile. 

So this is (naturally) a romance about how a mans wife was ended in a hit and run, she was the love of his life and nothing will ever be the same. 

Insert: 

His kids hot teacher. Whoa whoa whooooAAAaaa. 

Okay it wasn’t exactly like that, but this book is just as you suspect it will be.

Heartbreaking and lovely and with a piss off ending.

Classic Nicholas Sparks.

Always with the piss off endings.

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Summers Read Part 2

I’m backed up. Not…not in the bowel department. I don’t know why I feel like I needed to clarify that when you’ll see in a minute that I mean book reviews.

Either way. Here we are.

In The Woods–Tana French

This book was total trickery. 

In that I didn’t realize it was a series. I only read the first one, but now I need to read the rest to find out what the shit happened. 

This is about how kids were in the playing in the back woods in a Dublin suburb in 1984, and they only found one kid.

A parents worse nightmare. Two kids went missing and one was found covered in blood gripping a tree trunk and unable to remember what happened. 

20 years later the boy is a detective and he’s on the case of a 12 year old girl who was murdered in the same woods his friends went missing. 

He uncovers piece by piece what happened not just to the girl, but to his friends. 

Sort of. I remember being like ‘Wait WHAT.’ When it ended because it wasn’t finished and then I looked it up online and found out that it was part of a series. 

And then not committing to find the others and never solving the mystery. 

Not like me. 

But oh well. Someday i’ll finish that series because after rereading its synopsis I’m intrigued again! 

…Actually upon reflection that totally is like me. I stopped reading Game of Thrones three books in, I stopped reading Outlander after two books, I even stopped reading those Sweep books and had to return to them to finish them. 

My best friend is laughing at my previous statement of “Not like me.” haha. (She gets all the texts when I pick the series back up of “Hey…who’s dead and what happened???” 

Her memory is better then mine. 

Anywho: This book was interesting, maybe if I stumble upon the second book somewhere I’ll get back to it and solve that dang mystery!

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Weird Sisters–Eleanor Brown

This book was very enjoyable. Reminded me of me and my sisters. Only in that we are weird and so different from each other, and yet so similar. Really, if one of us didn’t have a sense of humour our family dynamics would be VERY different. 

Instead of making each other laugh, someone would’ve been stabbed a long time ago. 

Anyway, this book is about three sisters who find themselves back at home to help with their ailing mother. Their dad named them after three of Shakespeares leading ladies and only really speaks to them in verse. 

Which I would find infuriating, but also fun. I love Shakespeare. But I would’ve slapped my dad. 

Good book, well written, interesting story. Definitely read it. 

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I Know I Am, But What Are You?–Samantha Bee

Samantha Bee is (was, maybe?) the Most Senior Correspondent on the The Daily Show (In the Jon Stewart era) and is pretty damn funny.

This was a good summer book. Clever, well spoken, and had fun stories in there but not overwhelmingly political or heavy. But she also didn’t dumb anything down. It was lovely. 

I liked reading about her life and where she ended up. Despite the fact that people have always flashed her at weird intervals in her life. 

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Harry Potter and The Cursed Child–J.K. Rowling, John Thorne, Jack Tiffany

I wish I had seen this in play form. This was so interesting and cool! Even though JK Rowling didn’t write the play itself, she did approve of this and it’s based on a short story she wrote.

I missed my people. This is the only universe that’s ever felt completely like home to me.

Including this one we currently live in. Being a human is so boring sometimes.

So to be able to revisit it and see old characters, and see all our kids grown up and having an adventure was really fun, even if it was super heartbreaking at points.

This is about Harry as an adult and what’s going on with his children, as the synopsis concludes: Past and present collide and things get really super bananas.

Okay. They didn’t say that word for word, but here we are.

I really enjoyed this, for obvious reasons. It was quick to read given that the format is in that of a play and it’s for the characters to learn their lines.

I genuinely hope they make this into a mini series or something, that would be so cool.

Constant vigilance!

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Mr. Pip–Lloyd Jones

This. This book. Woof.

This was a case of judging a book by it’s cover and then not getting what I thought.

The cover is a fun looking mosaic of flowers, really colour popping look to it.

The actual story is beautiful and colourful and genuine and heart breaking.

Not to mention a fantastic story. This book sort of broke me for other books for awhile.

It’s a tale of thirteen year old Matilda who lives on an island in Papua New Guinea torn apart by war, and is constantly harassed by soldiers and rebels alike. Her only family member left is her mother, who is a God fearing and preaching type woman who accepts nothing but the utmost respect from all around her.

Their school is non-exist after so many people left the island. Then one day a man (Mr. Watts) helps the kids clear out the school of plants and trash and begins reading Great Expectations to the children who are allowed to come.

Matilda relates to Pip (the lead character in ‘Great Expectations’) in such a deep way. Soon the soldiers (or the rebels, I can’t remember) begin to try to find this Mr. Pip after so many kids are enamoured by the stories and talk about him as if he’s a real person.

This book came out of nowhere on my bookshelf, I just picked it up to read it and I loved it. It actually led to my reading Great Expectations again soon after.

Great book, must read!

Constant vigilance!

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Through the Storm–Lynne Spears

You read that right. I read Britney Spears’ moms book.

The funny thing about that is: 1) I could care less about anything Lynne Spears has to say.
and 2) I found this book in a thrift store (surprise surprise) and found a ticket stub for a flight somewhere with a girls name on it from high school! And it turns out it was her book for real.

Tiny world.

Anyway, this book was the autobiographical musings of Lynne Spears and on Britney’s life and what exactly went down in 2007 when Brit Brit lost her shit shit.

It was actually really nice to read a book from her moms perspective and even though I’ll never know the truth of anything because I don’t actually know this family, it was nice to think that this was all the truth and that her mom was really trying to tell her side.

Overall: good beach book, semi-interesting excerpts from Britney’s life (if you’re a fan that is.), and Mama Spears doesn’t pull any punches. I wouldn’t recommend it outright, but I wouldn’t tell you NOT to read it if you were in the mood for something like it.

You know?

Constant vigilance.

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