Let’s Pretend This Never Happened–Jenny Lawson

My friend who normally suggests incredibly upsetting (cough cough World War 2) books to me suggested this. 

Now, this has taxidermy on the front so you can imagine my dismay and skepticism at what I was about to walk into. 

But blindly walk into it I did and I was surprised as fuck and happily proven wrong.

This book was HYSTERICAL. I read it so friggin fast and loved every minute of it. 

This lady knows how to get you to wet yourself laughing! 

I enjoyed her tales of taxidermy collecting, how she terrorizes her husband Victor, and the way she talks about mental health and well being.

She’s lovely, fantastic, and a great writer.

Constant vigilance! jenny

But Enough About Me–Burt Reynolds

I think I’m psychic sometimes. 

Or I’m an evil witch who accidentally marks a person for death upon reading their autobiography. 

Poor sweet dirty bird Burt Reynolds. 

This book was so fun to read and incredibly interesting! 

I love a good autobiography these days and I really enjoyed how this sounds how he talked. His stories were cool, his life was amazing, and his heart was big as all get out. 

And man did he love Sally Field. 

And hate that photo shoot on the rug. He even wrote in the book how when he dies he hopes that no one remembers him JUST for that. 

Go figure on social media that’s the picture EVERYONE and their mother was putting up to commemorate him.

Rest in peace you hairy bastard. 

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Deranged Book Club

Hey there sports fans!

I just wanted to remind y’all that I have a book club on Instagram now!

It’s called “DerangedBookClub” and you can follow what I’m currently reading and join in the Instagram Live at the end of each month to hear my thoughts “in person” and actually kind of talk to me!

How fun! And weird. But I’m getting used to it.

Join up and say Hiiiiiiii!

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Bonfire–Krysten Ritter

I had been anticipating this book on my shelf for sooooo long. I LOVE Krysten Ritter. I like every character she’s played, I follow her on Instagram and love that she’s a knitter and does that in between doing scenes for shows and movies. 

I love her little weasel of a dog, Mikey.

Did I LOVE this book? 

I wanted to soooo bad. 

I commend anyone who writes a book. Writing books is hard. Like really really hard. 

And I super commend actresses and actors who write them because so much stigma comes when you write a book as an actor. People think you have a ghost writer, or that it’s going to be some fluffy piece of crap that’s just to make money.

 Let me tell you this: This was NOT a fluffy piece of crap. This was a thought out mystery and well written.

I just did not dig it as much I wanted to. Which was probably WHY I didn’t dig it. I built it up for too long and should’ve just read it when I found it. 

This book is about an environmental lawyer who goes home after a long stint of avoiding it. 

GoodReads does a better job of describing this:

It has been ten years since Abby Williams left home and scrubbed away all visible evidence of her small town roots. Now working as an environmental lawyer in Chicago, she has a thriving career, a modern apartment, and her pick of meaningless one-night stands.

But when a new case takes her back home to Barrens, Indiana, the life Abby painstakingly created begins to crack. Tasked with investigating Optimal Plastics, the town’s most high-profile company and economic heart, Abby begins to find strange connections to Barrens’ biggest scandal from more than a decade ago involving the popular Kaycee Mitchell and her closest friends—just before Kaycee disappeared for good.

Abby knows the key to solving any case lies in the weak spots, the unanswered questions. But as Abby tries to find out what really happened to Kaycee, she unearths an even more disturbing secret—a ritual called “The Game,” which will threaten the reputations, and lives, of the community and risk exposing a darkness that may consume her.

With tantalizing twists, slow-burning suspense, and a remote, rural town of just five claustrophobic miles, Bonfire is a dark exploration of the question: can you ever outrun your past?

 It was good. But not Argh inducing. You know? When a book is so good when you are done you’re like ‘AAAARRGGHHH I NEED SOMEONE ELSE TO READ THIS SO I CAN TALK TO THEM ABOUT IT!!!!!” 

Overall, good summer book to read lazily on the beach.

Constant vigilance!

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I Shouldn’t Drink While I Read

Love in a Nutshell—Janet Evanovich and Dorien Kelly

Guys, I’m so far behind this from last summer. Yeesh.

Which means, that I also kind of don’t remember it because during the summer I have a tendency to read books that are lighthearted and silly, and what I lovingly refer to as “nonsense books”.

I love Janet Evanovichs work, she’s hilarious and after reading the description of this book, I DO kind of remember it.

It’s about a woman whose husband left her, she was fired from her job, so she goes back to her parents summerhouse “The Nutshell” to try to turn it into a B and B while working as a spy for a beer company to pay the bills.

Roughly.

I remember liking it, I gave it a solid 3 stars so I definitely thought it was funny and entertaining.

Good summer read. The end.

The Husband List—Janet Evanovich and Dorien Kelly

Okay, I’ll level with you. Even after reading the description of this book to remind myself what it was about: I don’t remember it.

But I also gave it three stars so I enjoyed it last summer!!! I must have.

God I have to start writing little reviews on GoodReads to remind myself later.

Like Hansel and Gretels trail of breadcrumbs so I can find my way back.

I might have to reread this because reading the description it sounds funny and interesting.

Too bad it didn’t stick in my brain. I must’ve been drinking too many Caesars at the cottage when I read this.

Hot Stuff—Janet Evanovich and Leanne Banks

Maybe I just shouldn’t read during the summer….

Or while drinking.

Yet another summer read where I don’t remember diddly. But this also got a 3 star rating from me on GoodReads!

Basically this book is about a girl who rents a room in a condo belonging to a drag queen. She’s then made to look after his dog because his apartment keeps getting broken into. Cate starts falling for some cop. There’s socialites and tyre salesmen, all in all, it’s the same kind of humour as her Stephanie Plum series.

George’s Marvellous Medicine–Roald Dahl

Sigh.

Here’s another interesting book by Roald Dahl. And wildly inappropriate for a kid. I have to keep reminding myself that these are not meant for Daryl’s age group (Being 3 years old.) . That they are meant for older kids. But I also don’t appreciate what this one was saying to that age group either.

This is about George. George’s grandmother is a bit of an intolerable shrew.

All this woman does is complain and treat people like garbage. She talks down to everyone, she yells at them, and is a complete and utter unappreciative …well…asshole.

So I don’t blame George for thinking that maybe the old hag could use something to make her more pleasant.

Thus he creates his ‘Marvellous Medicine’.

Which includes things from the kitchen, things from the barn, things from the bathroom. I’m talking perfume, horse pills, toilet bowl cleaner, various things from around the house.

Most of which aren’t safe for people to be ingesting.

Which is why I was like “Oh Hell no Roald Dahl. What are you telling kids here!!!” I could understand if it was like peppers or flowers or something that wouldn’t cause a person actual harm, but the list of things this guy included shouldn’t be anywhere near an old persons stomach. Let alone a kids hands.

It was supposed to be magical, but I just found it disturbing.

This guy. *Shakes head*

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2015 Reading Challenge

Happy Friday little birds!

As you can see, no videos. I think I’m going to give up on the attempt for now. My computer has decided it doesn’t want to make them and has declared I have no camera attached. (Lies.) And I keep deleting what’s on my phone.

I am not tech savvy. Haha.

Anywho! After yesterdays sad news I thought I would end the week on a high note which means I’ll be doing two of my favourite things:

Making a list and reading.

I found a doohickey on Pinterest that sounds like a great challenge and I thought it would be fun if y’all joined me!

Here it is! Click to view.

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Happy Friday and I hope you are having as much fun this weekend as Miles Teller does ever. This is my favourite GIF of all time.

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